Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Nothing Gold Can Stay

From the platform at the top of the park, I could see the faint outlines and some of the remaining bricks of where the foundations of buildings once stood. The plaques scattered throughout the park show pictures of how life was just a hundred years ago--a mill, a storage building, a pedestrian bridge, all bustling with activity and industry. My eyes go back and forth from busy pictures to the scene before me, quiet and overrun with foliage. It's hard to believe so much has changed in so little time.

So different from a hundred years ago!
I love places like this. Places that echo with the voices of lives once lived. They keep me grounded. They remind me that my life is just a tiny blip in the vastness of eternity. My mind starts looking forward, to what this place will look like in another hundred years. I wonder who will stand here and wonder about my life and how I lived it. I wonder if they will look at my pictures and dream about a day in the life of Sarah in 2014. 

Let us keep proper perspective of our lives. Let us live every moment to the fullest, without taking ourselves too seriously. And let us leave a beautiful legacy to those who will come after us. Ours is too short of a life not to.

"Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold. 
Her early leaf's a flower;
but only so an hour. 
Then leaf subsides to leaf. 
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay."

-Robert Frost

Friday, September 12, 2014

Sabbath


I love me a clean house! The feel of a squeaky floor under my bare feet or the smell of fresh linens on my bed. Ahhh! It only lasts about 5 minutes before the dog, or the baby, or the husband track in something...but it's 5 minutes I thoroughly enjoy!

I've recently gotten back into the habit of taking a cue from ancient Jewish culture--getting my house in order before the Sabbath so I can focus on more important things. A few extra minutes washing dishes on Friday night, means more time for making pancakes instead of fishing for a clean dish Saturday morning. A quick vacuuming of crumbs and dog hair Friday night, means a clean canvas for wrestling, tickle fights, and reading all weekend. It means we can pack up and go out of town for the weekend or pack up a picnic lunch to take to the park. It means giving myself permission to not be a clean freak for a few days each week, and to do some of the other things I don't get to do--like painting, or reading, or sitting on the porch to watch the rain. 
More time for playing at the creek!

I challenge all of us to take a day each week and not do. For our sanity, our health, and the well-being of our families. 



Wednesday, September 10, 2014

The Longing

Tinker's Creek on a sunny, summer morning.

The breeze, blowing the first leaves of fall off the trees overhead. The mighty roar of the waterfall just feet away from me. The cold water swirling around my feet. I sat and breathed in the beauty of the walls of green all around me. My heart was filled with the presence of such an amazing Creator and I was at peace. 

But along with the joy of this moment was another familiar feeling...

Sadness?

Sorrow?

Loneliness?

But how? I was sharing a moment with the most perfect of all Beings and yet I was lonely? How can that be?

I wished that Joseph could be enjoying this moment with me. But I knew that even if Joseph was here, I'd still be lonely. I'd want my best girlfriend with me. All my girlfriends. My brother. My mom. My mom-in-law. 

If I start to think about it, I always feel lonely. Even in the midst of worship at my church, or dinner with my family, I feel lonely.

I long for companionship. I ache for it. It is always gnawing away in my heart. Always being satisfied, and yet always hungry. 

In her book, Captivating, Stasi Eldredge calls this ache, "A woman's infinite capacity for relationship." We have been made in the image of a Lover who longs to know us and be known by each of us. So we as women long to have deep, meaningful relationships. To be fully ourselves and to be enjoyed as we are. It is a beautiful aspect of femininity that we bring to the world. 

So there is nothing wrong with me. The loneliness is just a part of how I was made. So let it drive me to more sweet conversations over coffee. To more laughs and more tears with new friends and old. Let it be what makes me strike up a conversation with others who are lonely like me. Let it be what makes me better this world, one lonely person at a time.